Savages 2

I only had one day left in Montreal before heading back to New York. To my home and to my boyfriend.

But savage and I had to see each other again. Although everything in me was still very much sore after what we endured, just hours before, I just had to feel all of that weight in me, had to visit the depths of my instinct and decided to actively degrade my body to its lowest level to the point where I had to feel pain, was determined to be teared and torn.

We met at a bar and I couldn't be less interested on the vodka or the place or the music. This shit was NOT a date, this was called: can we just cut the crap and fuck, fuck, fuck? So I had two drinks, talked about whatever, 'cause you know sometimes I am ladylike and it's 'unbecoming' to say: Hi, can we fuck now? (blah)

So I told him. Can we fuck now?


We left and took a cab that took for fucking ever to arrive to his home. His building was O.K. clean outside, didn't look rundown or anything. Now, the entrance was another story. The moment he opened the door it seemed like the inside belonged to a building in the Bronx. Walls with cracks, peeled paint, stained doors and one of those, just missing, right across the hall from his apartment.

He said 'Oh, did I mention that I have roommates?' and I said, no. Then he added 'Oh, ok. Well I do.'
There was a long hallway and some rooms distributed on one side of the place. He took me immediatly to his room, where there was an inflatable mattress on the floor, and dishes, dishes with stuff everywhere. I sat on the mattress and opened my legs as the most direct invitation to me. He kneeled and kissed me and submitted me to the bed. Quickly, desperately and furiously I took his belt off, unzipped his jeans and he just slipped my dress off of me.

Oh God I really couldn't wait for him to be inside of me, that very thought of him just completing me with him, made me insane,
'cause I know how this feels,
'cause I love how this is,
... 'cause I long for this moment of bliss.

Savage was a smart, instictive lover. He really just let go and he just WAS.  But at moments I caught him totally gone and fucking me with wrath and hate. He could have shown me his long rows of teeth wanting to scrape the flesh off of my body.
Right then and there I allowed him continue on his sex voyage, inside of himself and just observed this human leaving it all on me.


Something else happened.